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My life is a crazy, unpredictable, jumbled mess of fun. Each day creating adventures and stories that will last a lifetime 

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Bullies, School and Parents

This year has been a hard year for a few of us parents. I have written more than one blog post on bullying this year.
Today my being at the school and staying until after first recess for the last three months finally paid off - I found the bully.
I also found out why one of the boys LIED (that would be mine) and the other wouldn't TALK (that would be J).
The Bully is a GIRL.

Today as I walked outside with G'man I found J at the end of the ramp pushed up against the cement steps by a girl in his class.
Now this girl is a pro, even in the first grade. She was close enough and leaning over him (6 inches taller than he is) but still far enough away that any teacher or duty would think they were just talking.
She was talking or rather threatening to choke him if he didn't give her his "duckies" (plastic ducks on the end of a necklace).
I told her to stop it and sent them both off - in separate directions.
5 minutes later I saw that she had once again pinned him, this time was holding onto his jacket so he couldn't escape.
Not only did I pull her aside to talked  with her teacher, I also called his mother and let her know what I found out. She has been very worried about the bullying and even more worried that they haven't found who was doing it.

She came a little while later to talk with the principle. This is where our semi good day of finding the bully went down hill.
The principle didn't help.
Didn't listen.
And talked down to the parent.
J's mom is going to the district - maybe they will listen.

Hint -
Do not tell a mother its not that big a deal.
Do not tell a boy that has been bullied to tears for months that he isn't afraid of her.
Do not spend the whole time trying to make light of the situation.

Just because she is a girl doesn't mean she's sweet, or that she won't hurt him - or that she hasn't hurt him in the past.
I say that the next time she puts a finger on either one of our boys - they come home with a scratch, a bruise or a cut and we will call the police and file assault charges.
We will defend our boys.
This is not something that is okay.
Threatening to choke someone is not okay.
Bullying done by anyone is not okay.
For a school that has a zero bullying policy, they sure didn't listen today. Something I really hope the district pays attention to. As much as I like the Principle (and I do) this is not right.
My witnessing her threatening to choke him should have been grounds for a red slip, not a slight scolding.

Hence the saga continues.
The sad thing is I am sure if we had pulled in a boy the matter would have been dealt with, quickly.

2 comments:

High Heeled Life said...

Good morning my friend; Shaking my head as I read this. I'm sure G'man and other little boy have been raised to respect girls ~ how awful this must have been that the bully is a girl. poor little guys must have been confused beyond imagination on what to do. I'm happy that you have been able to be there and were able to get some answers and identify the bully.

I wonder what this little girl must go through at home (what she sees and/or experiences) to think that it's right to treat others with so little respect and threats. Hopefully her parents are called in.

Though I feel very strongly against bullying be it from children or adults ~ I wish that the process would include therapy sessions for the bully. It is clear there is something going on with this little girl.

Blessings to you my friend...xo C. (HHL)

Telisha Garris said...

HHL - She has two years of bad behavior. Hitting, kicking and other violence not only to other but also to her self.
It is my belief that she needs to be placed in a special classroom for children with behavioral needs.
Her parents seem to dote on her - either to avoid her tantrums or because they love to spoil her but I don't see it as abuse at home, rather a girl who may need medication and therapy.

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