Sunny Day Picnic

I know I haven't been blogging lately - I wish I could say I was very busy - saving the world - something fun.
In truth though I have been done with the cold crappy weather. I lacked ambition. Focus.

Today, however, the sun came out! It was actually warm and dry!
The kids decided to celebrate by spending most the day outside - including begging for a picnic lunch outside.

A few months ago (my southwest Miche party) I bought 120 nacho bowls. (and yes that was the smallest amount I could buy at a time!)
Now I have been finding tons of fun uses for these containers around the house.
Today was another great day!
I made their sandwiches (turkey for G'man & PB&J for Prissy) in the cheese area I added some chips.

Yesterday we ran to IKEA, my hubby has a chair. A very special chair. The only chair.
You see a few years ago hubby had back surgery. This makes it very hard for him to bend, or move up and down.
Thus he can not have a soft, plushy, squishy chair. It needs to be firm. Supportive.
This is a chair we bought a few years ago at Ikea. Then the kids got a hold of it and... well after a few years of my children trying to climb the chair and their papa, it broke.
As this is the ONLY recliner we have ever found (5 years searching) that does not hurt his back, we went and got him a new one! This is his b-day, valentines day & fathers day all rolled into one.

I have lots of fun news I will be posting this week so I will be back! and soon!

Utah's Toxic Air

Before the almost full foot of snow that's dropped in the last two days, we had Toxic Fog. A thick heavy layer of smog, fog and pollution.

It hard to tell due to the large amounts of white, but its around 3 feet, yes its a four foot fence but it slopes down. Its hard to describe and depending on drift, my yard has anywhere from 2 1/2 to 3 feet. We have more snow inbound tonight and tomorrow so we will see what we end up with.
The rest of this post will be on last weeks issue of Toxic Fog ;). Hope you enjoy my rant.

New's Quote, 

The icy fog has smothered the Salt Lake Valley for several weeks and trapped lung-busting soot emitted in the city underneath.

The level of pollution in the city is now the highest in America according to the Environmental Protection Agency and medical experts are now urging residents to stay indoors.

And

The greater Salt Lake region had up to 130 micrograms of soot per cubic meter on Wednesday, or more than three times the federal clean-air limit, according to the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency.

Utah regulators are working on a set of plans to limit everyday emissions, including a measure to ban the sale of aerosol deodorants and hair spray that contain hydrocarbon propellants. Those plans, however, will take years to show results.

Snow cover amplifies the phenomena called a temperature inversion - Salt Lake City was a foggy freezer box Wednesday at 18 degrees, while Park City basked in sunny 43-degree weather. The warmer air aloft acted like a lid on the frigid valley air, leaving it with no place to go.

For weeks, industrialized cities in northern China have been dealing with bouts of sickening smog several times more toxic than Utah's. But by U.S. standards, Utah's pollution index is off the charts with readings routinely exceeding a scale that tops out at 70 micrograms a cubic meter. The EPA sets a standard for clean air at no more than 35 micrograms.

News links on our Toxic Air.

Daily Mail - Utah's Toxic Fog make's UK's newstands - great photos of the fog.

CBS News

Fox 13 - Attempting to make it sound better

Fox 13 - Our government not really making any changes - trying to leave cleaning the air up to using public transportation. 

Fox 13 - Utah Mom's for clean air trying to get government legislators to pledge to a more active role in cleaning Utah's Air.

Utah Mom's For Clean Air - How did I not know about this group until now?

So while the snow has in fact "cleaned" the air for us once again, the simple fact of the matter is any time the air "settles" (still air, dry air ect) we get inversion. That by itself is still nasty to breathe. Add in varying factors and voila Toxic fog/air. 

The main problem is that even if this legislative session makes and creates real air changing laws and ideas, it will be years until they are implemented and even more until they are effective. 

It can be another 10 years before we see cleaner air on a full time basis. 

So what do we do in the mean time?

I for one am looking into buying special masks for Asthma and Allergy. (links at bottom of post) Since my daughter Prissy has sever Asthma and hayfever, buying washable, re-usable masks is key.

I will also pick one up for my son and I - not sure if hubby will agree to wear one or not even though he also has asthma.

We may look silly for the first year or so - however, if things continue the way they are we may be at the forefront of a new fashion. At least locally.

How about you? IF you live/lived in a polluted area what measures would you take?

 

Links to masks

Here are the top two I am looking at

For the kids (latex free & washable)

For me and the hubby (washable)

and others

I can breathe Masks

Mask buying guide 

Elderly Abuse

Elderly Abuse and why we should be ashamed.

Mama & Grandma out to eat

Many states are still working through their laws - some only have physical and sexual abuse to an elderly. Other's abuse is confined to care centers. This is very important, please check your state laws and see how well they protect their elders.

My state, thankfully, will go after ANYONE who will try to harm or exploit an elderly person, even intimidation of an elderly person is illegal here - not only illegal, but you can be tried and found guilty of it.
After reading through many different state laws, I have to say that I am proud of my state!

My sister, Grandmother and myself

1. What is Elderly Abuse?

Elderly abuse can be anything from physical abuse, emotional abuse to taking advantage of trust to steal from them.
Visit NCEA home - National Center on Elder Abuse
If you suspect elder abuse, neglect, or exploitation,  Click Here for state reporting numbers, or telephone
the Eldercare Locator at
1-800-677-1116.

2. Who can turn in an Abuser?

Someone who knows either the Elderly person OR the Abuser. Family members, medical personal, clergy, social workers... anyone.

3. Can you be sued for turning someone in for Elderly Abuse?

NO. On the website listed, it clearly states that you need to report SUSPECTED abuse. They investigate and will determine whether or not its worth pursuing. You do not need concrete evidence to call in. This means you are not at fault if they are proven innocent.
In fact in a few states NOT reporting suspected elderly abuse is itself a Crime.

4. What is the punishment for Elderly Abuse?

This to me is kind of fun. A person found guilty of Elderly Abuse will be tried for whatever they are found guilty of - physical abuse, theft, embezzlement PLUS taking advantage of an elderly person.

By Utah State Laws - Terms and Definitions.

Exploitation:
(iii) unjustly or improperly uses or manages the resources of a vulnerable adult for the profit or advantage of someone other than the vulnerable adult;
     (iv) unjustly or improperly uses a vulnerable adult's power of attorney or guardianship for the profit or advantage of someone other than the vulnerable adult; or
     (v) involves a vulnerable adult who lacks the capacity to consent in the facilitation or furtherance of any criminal activity.
     (b) A person is guilty of the offense of exploitation of a vulnerable adult as follows:
     (i) if done intentionally or knowingly and the aggregate value of the resources used or the profit made is or exceeds $5,000, the offense is a second degree felony;
     (ii) if done intentionally or knowingly and the aggregate value of the resources used or the profit made is less than $5,000 or cannot be determined, the offense is a third degree felony;

Intimidation:
means communication conveyed through verbal or nonverbal conduct which threatens deprivation of money, food, clothing, medicine, shelter, social interaction, supervision, health care, or companionship, or which threatens isolation or harm.
If done intentionally or knowingly, the offense is a second degree felony.

Harm: 
means pain, mental anguish, emotional distress, hurt, physical or psychological damage, physical injury, suffering, or distress inflicted knowingly or intentionally.
Same fines and laws as stated above apply.

Deception means:
     (i) a misrepresentation or concealment:
     (A) of a material fact relating to services rendered, disposition of property, or use of property intended to benefit a vulnerable adult;
     (B) of the terms of a contract or agreement entered into with a vulnerable adult; or
     (C) relating to the existing or preexisting condition of any property involved in a contract or agreement entered into with a vulnerable adult; or
     (ii) the use or employment of any misrepresentation, false pretense, or false promise in order to induce, encourage, or solicit a vulnerable adult to enter into a contract or agreement.

These are just a few of the terms and fines as laid out in the Utah State Law.

Why should we be ashamed?

Ask any adult about elder abuse. Financial exploitation and they can tell you of at least one person who they KNOW to have exploited or have been exploited.

In my family we (the family) allowed "minor" emotional exploitation of my grandmother. I am very deeply ashamed that it went unreported for years.
Why? Because my grandmother started a cycle that we didn't know when or how to break.
She wanted her family to come to her for help.
Two people took advantage of this.
Her daughter and her daughter's daughter.
It started out as grandma helping because she could - because she wanted to.
It ended with her being pressured to change her will.
There are ways to protect yourself or your family member when the times comes - power of attorney is one way, but it has to be complete.
My uncle had power of attorney and yet my cousin was still able to get my grandmother to change her will without his knowledge - this is where you need to make sure to have all your T's crossed and your I's dotted.
Found out that she (grandma) left the money in a hidden trust before my uncle was made her executor.

My grandmother after her stroke

Why did we allow it to continue after it reached unhealthy and emotional levels?
Because my cousin and my aunt were leaches - they sucked small amounts from her. Nothing "worth" going to the police over. Nothing that would put my grandmothers financial future in danger.
Still the fact remains that grandma was taken from and pressured from those two to often to count. The rest of family treated my grandmother with respect and love.

Does this sound like Placating?
Good because it was and I am ashamed.

The fact is that we never want to prosecute family. We never want to have to step in and say ENOUGH.
We want it to magically work out. It doesn't.
Take a stand, get informed, protect yourself and your loved ones.

Enough Love...

I found a story on face book the other day that jumped out at me - especially this time of year.
It was called, I wish you enough.
You see 8 years ago today I lost my mother.

In fact I lost her shortly after this photo - within a few months - it was a sudden and wrenching loss.
The hole she left has never been filled, never gone away and has not diminished much over the years. As my kids grow, I wish for her guidance, her patience, her hugs and her laugh.

~~~

I WISH YOU ENOUGH.
Recently, I overheard a mother and daughter in their last moments together at the airport as the daughter's departure had been announced.
Standing near the security gate, they hugged and the mother said:
 "I love you and I wish you enough."
 The daughter replied, "Mom, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Mom."
They kissed and the daughter left.
The mother walked over to the window where I sat.
Standing there, I could see she wanted and needed to cry.
 I tried not to intrude on her privacy but she welcomed me in by asking,
"Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?"
"Yes, I have," I replied. "Forgive me for asking but why is this a forever good-bye?"
"I am old and she lives so far away. I have challenges ahead and the reality is the next trip back will be for my funeral," she said.
"When you were saying good-bye, I heard you say, "I wish you enough." May I ask what that means?"
She began to smile.
"That's a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone." She paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail and she smiled even more.
"When we said 'I wish you enough' we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them".
Then turning toward me, she shared the following, reciting it from memory,
 "I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.
 I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.
 I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.
 I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.
 I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
 I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
 I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye." 
She then began to cry and walked away. They say it takes a minute to find a special person. An hour to appreciate them. A day to love them. And an entire life to forget them.

~~~

I loved my mother. She was a very rare soul that knew how to LOVE.
I miss her all the time, but not for the reasons you might think.
I wish she could see my children.
My husband (who she adored)
Our home.
I know she would want to share our joys.
This week our family has been sick with a very nasty stomach bug, my husband to help me pass the time helped me set up a small area so I could paint my Christmas Village houses.
Painting them reminds me of my mother.
Of her village, her painting, her smile and my sister and I's reverence every year when we unpacked the village and placed it under the Christmas tree.
It was as if Christmas wasn't here and official until the village was set up.

So in-spite of how short our time was with our mother we did have enough love, enough memories and enough time... I just will always want more.
This holiday season the best gift you can give someone is your time. In the hustle and bustle of the season its easy to forget that love, friendship and being together is more important than anything that comes with bows.
So that when the time comes to say goodbye, you will have had enough instead of a lot of empty yesterdays filled with good intentions.

She's been gone 8 years, but the love she gave me still remains. 

Bullies, School and Parents

This year has been a hard year for a few of us parents. I have written more than one blog post on bullying this year.
Today my being at the school and staying until after first recess for the last three months finally paid off - I found the bully.
I also found out why one of the boys LIED (that would be mine) and the other wouldn't TALK (that would be J).
The Bully is a GIRL.

Today as I walked outside with G'man I found J at the end of the ramp pushed up against the cement steps by a girl in his class.
Now this girl is a pro, even in the first grade. She was close enough and leaning over him (6 inches taller than he is) but still far enough away that any teacher or duty would think they were just talking.
She was talking or rather threatening to choke him if he didn't give her his "duckies" (plastic ducks on the end of a necklace).
I told her to stop it and sent them both off - in separate directions.
5 minutes later I saw that she had once again pinned him, this time was holding onto his jacket so he couldn't escape.
Not only did I pull her aside to talked  with her teacher, I also called his mother and let her know what I found out. She has been very worried about the bullying and even more worried that they haven't found who was doing it.

She came a little while later to talk with the principle. This is where our semi good day of finding the bully went down hill.
The principle didn't help.
Didn't listen.
And talked down to the parent.
J's mom is going to the district - maybe they will listen.

Hint -
Do not tell a mother its not that big a deal.
Do not tell a boy that has been bullied to tears for months that he isn't afraid of her.
Do not spend the whole time trying to make light of the situation.

Just because she is a girl doesn't mean she's sweet, or that she won't hurt him - or that she hasn't hurt him in the past.
I say that the next time she puts a finger on either one of our boys - they come home with a scratch, a bruise or a cut and we will call the police and file assault charges.
We will defend our boys.
This is not something that is okay.
Threatening to choke someone is not okay.
Bullying done by anyone is not okay.
For a school that has a zero bullying policy, they sure didn't listen today. Something I really hope the district pays attention to. As much as I like the Principle (and I do) this is not right.
My witnessing her threatening to choke him should have been grounds for a red slip, not a slight scolding.

Hence the saga continues.
The sad thing is I am sure if we had pulled in a boy the matter would have been dealt with, quickly.

Shocking Topic - Sex

Being happily married for a little over ten years I still find it amazing how BIG Sex is in a marriage.

The having it
The not having it
The not talking about it
The openness
The guilt
The pleasure
The anger
The betrayal

This is going to be a very frank - out spoken post.
If you are delicate, single or under 18 you may want to go for a walk...

Let me address a few key topics

1. Foreplay
If a woman says, "Foreplay is over rated" - translation is - you suck at it and I have better things to do - like my nails.
If a man believes that Foreplay is over rated - again he sucks at it and doesn't understand.

Foreplay is a way to get both parties "ready", besides the bonding intimacy of the moment, it also helps make a woman tighter - making it in the long run much better for the man as well.

2. Sex in Marriage
I am a huge believer that sex needs to be between MARRIED people. (people married to each other that is)
When a woman has sex a chemical is released inside her brain emotionally bonding her to that partner - having multiple partners can lead to emotional damage.
I also don't understand how you can sleep with a random person - a person you won't trust your car keys, cell phone or bank account information to - but your body - that's okay. (*Shudders*)

When you are first married - its hard to be open and honest about everything because you don't want to offend the other person.
My hubby and I went to a marriage weekend a few months before we were married (separate rooms) the best advice they gave was to be open and honest about what you liked, didn't like, to openly ask for what you wanted.

From day one we were.
It was brutal.
Tears fell - fights happened.
However, it was amazing how quickly we got on the same page. How soon we started to be in harmony.
It was the best thing we did being honest so early in our marriage - before we had kids - when we were still having sex an average of 3 times a day.

10 years and two kids later - we average once to twice a week. I have found out due to my casual attitude about sex, that we are not the normal married couple.
Many couples think its normal for once a month - some even think once a month is good!

Sex keeps you bonded to your partner - it helps stave off hurt, loneliness, anger, bitterness and misunderstandings. It makes you feel better, emotionally and physically.

Last year when I spent the summer talking to a shrink she was amazed at how we had held onto "our time" even with young children and all that comes with it.
Late night moments, melatonin for the kids so we get a solid half hour and showering together are ways we have found to steal a few moments just for us, for our future and for our marriage.

You need to remember that YOU choose your partner. You planned forever with your partner. Your kids will grow up and leave, you will either be with a loving partner, a stranger you once knew or you will be looking for partner number ---.

3. Emotions and Sex
Hollywood has this glamorous picture of sex.
Everyone that hooks up with someone is happy - they both climax, they both feel a high.
This is a sad sad lie.

If you have been abused or have a partner that was sexually abused - sex is both needed and a minefield.
If you are pregnant or had a baby - sex (the drive) can disappear. Even having sex can be more of a chore than a pleasure.
Hormonal imbalances and other medical issues or medications can cause problems.

This is another reason you need to talk to your partner about what is going on. Also you need to talk to your doctor - we don't like talking about these issues and emotions. Somehow - not quite certain how - but we all feel we must work through it on our own.
I haven't quite figured out why we think this way - why we think its shameful, embarrassing or isn't important.
However, many times this is a side effect of something larger.

Betrayal - against the lie of Hollywood, the lie of the "perfect couple", the lie of "happily ever after." Against sexual betrayal, cheating, affairs or being told that you aren't good enough.
Sex is complicated, fun and very messy.
Its emotional.
Its embarrassing.
Its rewarding.

When you get it right, you both end up wanting more, being happy. When its right, you don't care and aren't ashamed of your reactions, begging or demanding during the act.
When done right you can both climax together. Something that many people don't believe can happen, but I have to prove them wrong 80% of the time my husband and I climax together.

 SEX - is something that should be talked about. Not some hidden secret, not something to be lied about or faked. It isn't about that moment - its about making the next one better!
You see when we were young and had the energy to go three times a day or more - it wasn't as rewarding.
Now that we are older, pressed for time and lets face it more tired - our sex is amazing.
Nothing is held back, hidden or withheld.
Being emotionally naked as well as physically naked is one of the hardest things I have ever learned to do - and it has been oh so worth it.
 

Beauty For Ashes

Isaiah 61:3

New Living Translation (NLT)

³ To all who mourn in Israel,^[a]
    he will give a crown of beauty for ashes,
a joyous blessing instead of mourning,
    festive praise instead of despair.
In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks
    that the Lord has planted for his own glory.

How many times in life have you heard or said, God must have allowed it? I'm sure he had a purpose for ___? I'm sorry that happened BUT maybe it was for _____?

WRONG! Very very wrong! The Bible says - 

John 10:10

New Living Translation (NLT)

¹⁰ The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.

The thief being Satan and MY being Jesus/GOD. 

Bad things happen. They happen everyday to good people. People that have angels and families that love them.

They don't happen because GOD says to himself, this horrible thing will help my child. They happen because Satan is doing all he can to hurt, destroy and kill your happiness, your life and your future.

However, God can turn bad things into beautiful things. He can turn the horrible into the incredible.

My garden inspired me. I had this talk for about the 8th time with a beautiful woman who I love dearly. People continue to judge her, lie to her and try to hurt her - even by trying to validate the abuse she suffered.

While I was mulling over a better way to illustrate verses and ideas she has heard and read a thousand times, I gardened.

I have a fire place, I save all the ashes from my fireplace to add to my garden soil. Because it adds the best nutrients into the ground.

Its also one of the major reasons that people live next to live volcano's. Hawaii is the best example I know of. The plant life is lush, the seasons warm, the land filled with plenty. However, a horror is always looming. Doom can descend at any time.

Volcano's are one of the MOST destructive powers in the natural world.

It can't be reasoned with.

It can't always be predicted.

It can't be protected against.

You run or you die.

It kills without discrimination.

Everything in its path dies.

The air is death.

The ash is death.

The heat is death.

and yet... when its over life springs forth stronger and more vibrant. 

Just like a volcano, rape, abuse, hurt, pain & betrayal, can be the most destructive force in a persons life.

Many people commit suicide due to how fearful or un-hopeful they become.

God's promise of, Beauty for Ashes, is evident whereever a volcano explodes. If he can over come the most destructive force in nature and quickly too, so can he heal your hurt and turn a bad thing into a good thing.

Using a bad experience or a bad thing in your life for God's glory doesn't mean that "it was meant to be." Or that you were destined for that pain - but it can take the bad and use it for good. 

The best thing a person can do is allow God to heal the pain and to then use it to help heal others.

Taking the victory away from Satan.

The volcano doesn't disappear, nor does the damage of what has happened in your life.

The ash doesn't get swept away.

However, it becomes something more - something better.

 

10 days for 10th anniversary

Wow!
I have a lot to say so the shortest is - THANK YOU JESUS! Last night I went down stairs to turn off the lights and I smelled a awful smell, a few minutes later I found one of my son's shirts bundled up INSIDE his bedroom light about to catch on fire - really huge burn marks all over it!
So grateful I went down there! We could have lost our home last night!

Our tenth wedding anniversary is Friday. To celebrate Hubby took off 10 days. Ten days to celebrate 10 years.
Each day I have an envelope full of things for us to do - we pick one a day and voila! That's our special family time. Some days are family days - other days are couple days. To mark the difference I wrote, "need babysitter." on the special day envelopes.
This is very important as I wrote them all out a month ago when I had the idea, but didn't know when people would be available to watch the kids.

Day One:

Water balloon fight with our kids and all the neighborhood kids!


Day Two:

Family game night & Fondue!

We had a very yummy cheese fondue with two sausage's and a garlic bread
Then games! Lots and lots of games.
Then finished the night with Chocolate fondue, served with grapes, angel food cake & banana's.
Strawberries would have been nice, but the store didn't have a good selection.

I don't know what tomorrow's envelope will bring, but I know that it doesn't have to cost a lot to mean a lot.
I will try to keep up on photos and ideas.

However before I leave you I will offer one marriage advice tip:

When you fight (all couples fight) finish it to the end. I don't care how many times you have to say - that's not what I meant. I said this but meant this. I feel this about ----. I need you to hear....
Don't just get frustrated and quit. It's important to be heard and understood - you may need to breathe, start over and try again, but don't let it drop.
Any time you let something drop - as a peace keeping tool - it can fester.
You can finish an argument without coming to agreement.
You can calm down and finish a fight without heat.
Remember marriage is all about the long game.
You picked this person to marry because you wanted to grow old with them - to share your life with them.

Gleevilly!!!

Gleevilly - Mash up of Gleeful & Evilly! Just imagine me - laughing manically, crazed eyes, evil smile and I know the chubbiness makes me look all sorts of cute and fluffy - inside however....

Autism Acceptence/Awareness

A year ago I wrote a post titled, Who has been robbed or blamed? That went over quite well, for a while at least. I even gained followers rather then lose them. (I might this time, though)
Today in honor of Autism Awareness day (light it up blue) my BFF writer of Speaking on the Spectrum, wrote another (shocking!) post on why the Autism Community needs to SHUT UP and get along!

I don't know what drama triggered her anger this time (I know what triggered mine a year ago)

So here we go again.

Valentines Day Pampering

First off I stated by taking the kids to school - if you want a nice morning of pampering getting rid of the kids is a MUST!
Next I made my version of Lemon Sugar Scrub, substituting Lime for Lemon - you can also use a scented oil - I wouldn't I really like the acid of of the citrus it gets rid of all sorts of smells - including garlic.

I cleaned the bathtub - I know most people already have a clean tub - but if I am going in for a nice long soak I like to double check.
Made the water as hot as I could - added some bath salts, soaked, shaved, relaxed, inhaled my scentsy and just was.
After washing my hair & adding in the conditioner I emptied out the tub (I know you wondering where all this detail is going - be patient) then I grabbed my new scrub and rubbed it every where decent you can apply it.
Here's the thing. For those of you out there that like salt scrubs - they dry out your skin. The do exfoliate - but they also damage.
Using salts in your bath is a good way to prep your body to shed skin - without drying out your skin.
Sugar scrubs are just as exfoliating (I think they are a little better due to smaller granules).

Then of course I washed off under hot - then warm water. Ending the shower on a colder tone help to re-close the pores.

Also side note: another bonus to using a sugar scrub instead of a salt is if you end up accidentally liking your fingers it isn't that gross.

After then I pat dried and sat in my towel allowing the rest of the oil to soak into my skin for at least half an hour.
My skin hasn't felt this great in years - why? - because I rarely take time to take care of myself.
Take a moment figure out when you can pamper yourself for just a little bit - turn one regular part of your routine into something extra special.
This is cheap - easy and WONDERFUL!

The above recipe is normally for Hand Scrub - do not use to often on your body or you will also hurt your skin!

S.O.P.A & other various rants

Tomorrow we (the anti SOPA ~ non military government people) will be observing internet silence.

Jan 18th 2012 from 8am-8pm (est)

Free Advice Vol. 6 Survivor & Budgeting

A few months ago I wrote a blog titled: Free Advice Vol. 5 Survivor President 

Before that was Reform & Cuts

Today I am following them up.

The 13th, Friday and Me

Maybe people make their own "luck" or if you believe something will happen it will.

~~~~

Art & Free Advice!

My little girl (Prissy) is an artist - very much like her papa and auntie. So today we bought her a new art set.

My son (LittleMan) seems to have acquired my artistic talent - meaning I am GREAT painting ceramic Christmas houses - coloring in between the lines.... and writing, did I mention I am a really good writer?

So far he is taking after me - as in the can not draw my minds eye for ANYTHING! Praying that he will grow into more of his fathers talents as he ages!

So far the best part is that just like me - he doesn't care. Painting in and of itself is fun! Love the heart and the joy he brings to his art work!

This is the new art work gracing the walls of the kids down stairs living room. Why the previous owners used dark paneling in a dimly lit basement is beyond me, however, we are trying to lighten it up until the time we can afford to re-panel. (not very high on our to do fix it list)

Anything and everything we can do to bring some brightness and cheer to their area we will do - we want them to WANT to be down there!

Tomorrow I will post pictures of my newest obsession - organizing!!!

Did I mention that finally after several years I feel awake? Oh yeah - I am cleaning (amazing I know) don't get you hopes up though my bedroom is still a disaster!! (working on it tomorrow - or just crying thinking about working on it) I am organizing, cooking, helping with homework and keeping pace with life in general!

So glad that I took time - real time - for me and my problems this summer. Its funny but I kept putting it off because my family needed other things - "they" were more important ect ect ect....
Now, however, that I am ME again and my mind and body are fully awake, I can tell you that putting off taking care of me hurt them far more then it helped them.
They needed me - not the zombie drone barely awake, barley functioning me - the real me.
After I took a small amount of time I knew I should have taken care of my issues so many years ago. I can never make up to my family the years my putting "me" off cost them.
If you have depression, exhaustion, no motivation, lack of caring - please seek help!

Paul, former Avenger Rep & Jersey Girl

So yesterday's drama - read here Nerd Battle: Pax vs. OceanMarketing. Where a customer service rep named Paul went off on a customer.

In all the letters (from Paul to Dave, Mike K. and now a news reporter) he always mentions how RUDE Dave was. I've read the letters (Epic Letter Here) (Whining Here) and all I see is honest genuine concern, which starts to get pressed when Paul keeps giving him ridiculous answers.

A much better way to have handled the thousands of angry customers over the delay of the product would have been to send them all a mass email detailing what was going on with the product and what the company was attempting to do about it - then take the responses one at a time - RATHER - then waiting for each and every customer to get angry, impatient and annoyed.

So first the company did make a mistake - they allowed their customer base to get riled, with no information or reaching out - then dumped them all on their Reps - who I must say seem to have been poorly trained. Side note: it is believed at this time that Paul owned in part the company to make the Avenger Controllers and was the founder and CEO of OceanMarketing. The company of the Avenger controllers has parted ways with Paul (before this event happened) and Ocean Marketing seems to have crashed due to this incident.

Does that excuse Paul from his ridiculous response? Heck NO!
I'm just saying he isn't the only one at fault here.

Today he was interviewed by MSNBC Here between whining that his life is awful and everybody needs to stop picking on him - he also kept bragging on how none of his other clients have dropped him and how he hopes the negative feedback will turn positive in a few months time.
Sorry dude - wishful thinking won't help you.
Maybe you should rent - buy, at least watch Jersey Girl.

After he is done watching Ben Affleck pull a "Paul" 7 yrs ago, hopefully he will realize quickly - much quicker then the idiot in Jersey Girl - that he should find a new career path.

He seems to misunderstand Nerds, Geeks and Gamers - They don't forgive being bullied. Why? Because too much of their life and childhood was filled with bullies - the bullies never had any remorse, never stopped and apologized - not until someone stood up and said NO.
If the bully has no compassion - should the one being bullied have compassion? And if he does, does that mean he is ALLOWING and Enabling the bully to continue?

Obviously this is not disappearing any time soon, my advice to Paul - the less you say the better - because each time you open your mouth you come across as insane (at best) and an idiot (at worst).

ps. Yes I love gaming, my gamers and my nerd hubby. So yes I will continue to follow this - honestly its better than TV!
Mikes latest respons here: I wwebsite as on the-

Nerd Battle! PAX vs. OceanMarketing

 Click photo to buy the shirt!

Now there is a TON of information on this - in fact I am surprised its not trending on Twitter yet - however, by nightfall, it most likely will be.

I am going to add a LOT of links to this blog as the WHOLE story would read like a book - seriously!
However, I know many of my readers and I KNOW you don't like clinking a lot of links so I will tell you the Epic letter link is a MUST READ. From then on all the links will just be proving my point and laughing hysterically at the idiot at Ocean-Marketing.

P.S if you are a smart mouthed, idiot, know-it-all with a super bad attitude and equally bad spelling - here's some of my famous Free Advice: Don't Piss Off A Nerd.
Why? Well for 1. They aren't stupid 2. They aren't alone 3. They now rule the cyber world. ;)

Alright so here is the run down a normal every day (seemingly nice guy named Dave). He ordered two avenger controllers (my link is to a reliable seller ThinkGeek)- after several weeks of nothing - he wrote the company asking what was going on with the product.
Here is the letter, response, and the ensuing battle that has now became EPIC! (Seriously must read) and NO I didn't make this up and neither did they - I like Mike (creator of penny arcade) and he is a genius and all, but really this stuff just can't be made up!

How did I find out about a Nerd battle while my husband is a work? Well... I follow Wil Wheaton on Twitter as well as Felicia Day and several other fabulously famous Nerds!

Now following Mike's cue to research him - I did ;) Here is his Wiki page Mike Krahulik, here is a link - linking Penny Arcade and Pax East, here is a link of Mike K being interviewed concerning PaxEast2011.

As many of you know, I am very fair. So I researched Ocean-Marketing. What I found was he really, REALLY likes to plagiarize. Here it is all laid out in typical nerd form!  
This is why you really should not ANGER the Nerd Community - they not only have a ton of free time, also they know how to research things QUICKLY! LOL so far all of my research on Ocean-Marketing continues to show what a half @$$ed! site and company it really is - even it's "official twitter" site only has TWO posts.

Best part of the whole thing? Pax is having an event in 2012 in SEATTLE!!! Aug 26-28! Now I want to go! LOL
Pax East 2012 will be in Boston.

Bring it Rude Dude at Ocean-Marketing I can tell you who will have the last laugh - guys like Dave who are championed by men like Mike & Wil Wheaton!

ps. One site is claiming that they started this and it was a hoax - from all the research I did, including finding this story ON penny arcade I'm going with Real.
And yes its NOW trending on Twitter!

Update: Paul (jerk from OceanMarketing) wrote Mike - saying sorry and to please tell everyone to stop being mean to him. Now I'm with Mike on this one, if you have sympathy for Paul please re-read the Epic Letter. Paul is the one yelling, screaming, swearing and bulling and NOW that he has found out how tiny he really is in the universe he's sorry.
Here is the newest of the between Mike and Paul 
and yes I will continue to follow this story!

To follow every single bit of this story, links, replies, spam comments, ect you can find it all Here at Reddit. 

Also the apology to Dave -

Hey Dave,
I just wanted to apologize for the way our emails progressed from beginning to end , You caught me on an extremely bad day and I had been dealing with 100’s and hundreds of emails trying to explain the situation to everyone on where the product was and you just pushed me a little too much and I should have just apologized and tried to explain things better. Also I had a really bad day losing a friend to an overdose and the stress of my newborn baby and the Holiday ,missing my family and just stressing on getting product out to everyone and why it was held up in customs wore me out.
I am deeply sorry for any disrespect , aggravation or lack of information on the delivery date. We knew when product was leaving china and we were trying to adhere to a strict deadline but due to port issues and air freight issues. The units are domestic now and awaiting pick up at customs . So we missed the 17th deadline and I apologize for that but it was out of my control and besides me no one else was helping me handle the situation so imagine the weight on my shoulders.
I’m not asking for any sympathy just for some understanding and forgiveness , I’m human just like everyone else and made a mistake. I underestimated you and its cost me a lot of trouble thousands of spam emails , a lot of personal bashing , and internet spam and trouble and just overall stress with my wife and newborn. I ask that you please accept my apology as a peace offering I will refund your money and give you your 2 units/Avengers free of charge please help me to get some of this negativity removed or at least my personal name although its already all over the internet and the calls and emails will not stop but any help will be appreciated especially with penny arcade as Mike and edit his own website I owe him an apology too which I will write next.

For the most recent update Click Here: Paul, former Avenger Rep & Jersey Girl

Eew and Awe

The battle of the sexes.
Its universal. Yin and Yang. Him and Her, She and Him. Men are from Mars... you get the drift.

When I was little I remember looking at boys and wondering why their mothers would let them act like that? Why that nice sweet woman would allow him to be or do such and such...

Now as a mother of both a girl and a boy, I know the answer. God made boys that way. Really and truly some of the most yucky, gross and disgusting things about boys (or so I always thought) is natural.
I have, however, come to have an appreciation for this - what I will now call the Eew and Awe factor.

I know, I know, first off you would like to know what the Eew and Awe factor is. Well to put it mildly it truly is the difference between the sexes.
How did I figure this out? Easy I have a boy and a girl.
If my girl hears someone say the word, "Awe" she comes running. She wants to hear, see, or be apart of it. When she hears the word or says the word Eew its with disgust and disdain.

My son on the other hand practically ignores the word Awe but will come running at the word Eew. Why? Because gross is fascinating to him and cute isn't.

Now back on to my revelation of why this is now something I can appreciate. Women get a ton of crappy jobs. We bathe, clean up and wash up after babies, pets and the like. Do we like it? NO.
However, despite the fact that I will clean up crap (literally), I will NOT gut and clean a fish or deer.
Dead bird in the grill of my car? Yup made the man clean it out.

Now I LIKE that men find EEW to be so cool. Its because I DON'T!
Now before the crazy feminist camp jumps all over me I will say, I will do what I have to when I have to, BUT only when I HAVE to. If my husband is around I will give him 100 bonus points (to spend weekly - they do NOT accrue) for him to take care of it.
He (thankfully) loves being the hero!

Growing up I was much more of a "Tomboy" I played with snakes, mucked around in mud and spun coins better than most boys in my class. I carefully hid and masked certain dislikes and NEVER ran from something a boy held. Mostly because I learned quickly that if you ran, they chased you, if you petted, rubbed or commented on whatever gross disgusting object they were holding they would leave you alone.
Thus I was better protected then most girls in my class by my ability to control my face and my feet.

My daughter - she didn't get the super self control gene. She runs, squeals and screams with the best of them.
My son - is a proper dirt loving, hill rolling, gross loving boy.
I love them both no matter the amount of times they cause me to say the words Eew and Awe!

Free Advice Vol. 5 - Survivor President

Here is my Free Advice on how to fix our Nation once and for all.

Disclaimer - First off this is not an attack to any party - lets face it they BOTH suck. We vote R or D because the majority does and voting for another party is a wasted vote (we may all need to get together and vote for a non party - soon!)

Lets get very REAL Sen. John Boehner- WANTS the deal to go through. Pres. Obama - WANTS the deal to go through - they just don't want to look like jack asses when they do it - they BOTH want it to be the OTHER PERSONS FAULT!

America I am sick of the games. Here is a small thread that has been going down on FB.
 ------------------------------------------------------------------------
Telisha (me)
So Pres. Obama says Social Security may not be paid after 8-2-11 if they don't reach an agreement. I have a MUCH better idea. Rather than not paying the people who depend on that small check every month, let's not pay ANY Politician (including Obama) for the next year and see if that helps them to work a little harder for US.....the little people.

            Telisha  Also - we need to ACT like a poor country and stop SPENDING!! Any person on the hill that goes over budget needs to be FIRED and face penalties.
            We also need to stop playing war turn defensive instead of offensive.
            Lets also stop calling ourself a "prosperous nation" lets face reality, we were then we borrowed.
           
            Pam I thought it was Baner that threatened that....hmmm have to listen again. I say we take their checks till they come to their senses !!!!
           
            Telisha to ‎Pam  - I'm not saying it was the Pres or even attacking him. Stating point of fact that instead of threatening the old, sick and disabled they need to stop and make some REAL changes not this whishy washy mamby pamby baby crap they keep screaming at each other.
            Its pathetic.
          
           ‎(Pres Obama was pointing out to Boehner that if the agreement didn't go through that would be the fall out - it was not a threat) This is not an attack again, merely Point of FACT.
        
            Pam  I didn't think you where attacking them girl and I'm sick of it too! In-fact if they don't send checks in September I will default on my housing and be on the street and Dustin will loose his apartment also! I just was thinking it was more a republican threat to cut off SS checks. Either way I agree tax Warren Buffets of the world ...they even want to be taxed! Walmart could stand to pay more than they do to!
          
            Telisha  I am sick of the posturing, the lies and WHERE they choose to cut back - instead of NOT going over budget and firing those that do - they cut special needs fundings and research grants.
            Instead of NOT paying for several wars we have no real business being in they want to hike taxes on the lower end middle income - you know all those people BARELY making their house payments.
          
            I am fed up with listening to the same old political watch my butt, lie my ass off and DO NOTHING TO ACTUALLY TAKE ANY DAMN RESPONSIBILITY !!!
          
             Each of the men at the table might learn a lot about life if they had to live like a middle class American for a month! Survivor Political style!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yup that's my real take on things. We need real change not the same old stupid posturing that they have been doing for over ninety years.
I vote R less for political reasons, more for moral and spiritual reasons, I however, am not blind to the faults of both parties.

Lets shake it down

Republicans -
Treat the US like a slave nation to the wealthy, we should all be grateful little zombies that we HAVE our pittance.
If we CHOOSE to be born disabled, handicapped or impaired in any way that's our American Freedom and pretty much the only one we have left!
They even want to dictate FREE adults and wearing seat belts (seriously we might be better off allowing the dumb to kill themselves by their own stupidity)  we are ADULTS, it should be our common sense FREEDOM.

Democrates -
Play the FAKE saviors to the poor while they exploit them more than anyone else.
Point of Fact read this article on the Ten highest taxed states and the Ten lowest - the majority of the HIGHEST are Democratic states - numbers that speak for themselves.
Ten and Ten Article Link
So really what is their Agenda? I keep hearing about how everyone needs the SAME care, the SAME opportunities, everything the SAME something - its getting more Marxist and socialistic sounding then Democratic.

Personally at the moment both parties should be taken out put on a dessert island and whoever survives wins. (Until the next election where I vote we do it again.)
Honestly I would rather watch Survivor for President! then the dirty political campaigns of recent years!

Netflix - the yay and nay!

I love Netflix!

A little less though with their new instant play whishy screen (major hate)

However we have been long term customers for years - I mean seven or eight years.

We have never needed cable instead we bought a computer just for the TV!

Seriously it plays Netflix's right to our flat screen!

With the kids we made some simple rules.

They have to be in the kids section before picking out a movie.

Then we have a small list of shows they aren't allowed to watch

Top of the list

Sponge Bob

Other than that we have been very gracious about trying out new shows and movies.

I am with the kids almost all the time so its easy for me to monitor.

Right now Prissy loves a show out of Australia with three girls that turn into mermaids.

Free Advice Starts here:
LittleMan's newest obsession should have been on my NOT list - only I was never warned!

So to all parents out their whose children are not addicted to this 

Beware!

So for parents like me that have lists 

grab your Pens!

I swear this is the most insane nonsense show out there!

To me its a compilation of, Peewee Hermon, an old school video game & Sesame Street.

Its like the perfect show for kids with ADD - only if your not trying to help out their attention span.

Now if you have tiny tots that love this show - power to you,

I have a 5-year-old that is addicted

its not near as cute!

They have sections that remind you of a cheap sesame street

Like the drawing guy he acts like he is trying to do a dry eyes impression of Mr. Noodle

It comes across as boring.

Also half of their sets remind me of The Original Series of Star Trek

I keep looking for Spock!

Then there is the dude in the orange.

He could be a gay alien from Star Trek

But he would be shot within the first ten minutes of the show.

In fact THAT I might watch!

As always I am in no way paid for any form of advertisement and to be honest who would pay for this?!