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My life is a crazy, unpredictable, jumbled mess of fun. Each day creating adventures and stories that will last a lifetime 

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

October - Anti Bullying Month


Its amazing with so many things going on that October is Anti-Bullying Month.

Yesterday, I was called (again) by my son. He had another accident. It was 10:11 am.
This is the second time in two weeks that he has had an accident at school before 10:15 am - which incidentally happens to be first recess.

Now I want to be clear - he is not having the accidents on purpose to come home or to get me to come to the school.
However - due to a bully at school - he is making himself physically ill, just thinking about recess and the drama that comes.
His BFF J'Man has come home with foot print bruising right over his kidneys as well as a long (5-6 inches) fingernail scratch on his chest.

My son has been pushed down the steps twice and hit once in class. The kid that hit him, is not the playground bully and has been moved to another class.
Now the hard issue is my son has speech issues, he is in speech therapy, but due to the fact that he didn't really start talking until he was four - he is behind the other kids.
Which makes it hard to understand his description of the bully.
His BFF is a great talker - but scared of repercussions and has been unwilling to point out the bully.

Over time I have pulled both his Teacher and the Principal into this matter and they are both willing to get to the bottom of it.
First and foremost for me though was getting my son to last a full day at school.
So today, bag in hand I went to the school and helped out in his class all morning long.
His teacher - being wonderful - allowed him to stay in during recess.

Hopefully soon this will be taken care of and my son will be able to enjoy recess once again. Until then though, I will be at the school in the mornings.
Doing whatever it takes to get my son safely through another day.

Now this is becoming a HUGE problem! Not just because of this bully, but all the "bullies" that have been put back into the Salt Lake County School District this year.
You see due to budget cuts, they downsized special needs classes as well as behavioral classes. 
So in a state that has the highest amount of Autistic kids in the nation, not to mention societies worsening parenting problems and the behavior issues that are coming from it.
Instead of increasing our teachers for the flux of kids that need the extra help - they keep decreasing it!

If you have ever thought to yourself that you don't need to worry about budgets for special needs children because your kid isn't one - think again. If a kid with violent behavior doesn't have a class to go to - he ends up in a class with yours.
This is something that affects EVERY child, not just some.

I truly feel for my son's teacher and principal. They don't want these issues. They know that several kids in the school shouldn't be here - in fact last week a boy was taken out of the school in handcuffs because he broke another child's hand!
They also have to work within a broken system.
They have to wait until the ticking time bomb goes off and hurts someone before they can re-force the school system to place that child back into an appropriate class.

My nephew, has Autism. My nephew is wonderful and I love him. He is also in a behavioral class because he is a violent child. Luckily, he is not in Utah and will not be placed back into an open classroom - not for several more years.
Both families need the help! Mine to keep from being bullied and my sisters to keep her son from hurting others and himself.

Its rather odd that while I am going through this with our family today's viral news is of a media Anchor getting bullied for being, "FAT".
Showing that bulling is not just a childhood issue.
Her response to a very idiotic bully was amazing - READ HERE.

This is yet another reason that I support DOVE, for trying to change people's views on "the right look."
I am proud of this news team for having a "heavier" woman as an anchor.
Yes obesity is a bad thing, yes its a growing trend.
However, so is Anorexia. 
Being happy and accepting yourself is key!
Labels and cruel words are not okay - at any age or for any reason.

As a chunky woman I can attest that losing weight is NOT easy. I don't want to be fat. I don't want to have my middle baby tire.
Its not something I choose to keep.
I am eating "right" and increasing activity in my life.
But to have someone judge me, or others like me just because we don't fit the ideal image, well that says alot about you.

Please talk to your children - make sure you know what is going on. Also be aware of your negative words - they do hurt.


High Heeled Life said...

Telisha, AMAZING post!!!! I'm so sorry that L'man is having to go through this challenge in his life... children can be cruel and most often their cruelty is due to what they see/hear at home or due to the lack of care/love they receive in the home. It's unfortunate that the system is as screwed up as it is ... both the child being bullied and the bully need much more support than the system gives.

Thankfully you are providing the missing support for L'man.

I couldn't believe when I saw the piece on the news reporter - on our local Toronto news. My hat off to her ... I loved when she pointed out "what example the writer must be setting for her own children - in saying look at the fat news woman"...

People need to show greater understanding and compassion for others. Someone maybe larger due to illness; medication, or an array of health problems - and may have nothing to do with their eating habits or exercise.

Wishing you a peaceful and blessed week..xo C. (HHL)

Telisha Garris said...

Thanks HHL! I really wish there was an easy path - a quick fix for my son.
However, I am hoping that he will learn that I am there for him, the school system is trying to help him and we all want him to be safe and happy.

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